Common Conflict

Do not take revenge on others or continue to hate them, but love your neighbors as you love yourself. I am the Lord. Leviticus 19:18

Are you ever shocked at the ugliness which can pour out of you or your loved ones?

It’s as if sin has a literal face. And sometimes that face is your own.

Relationships really shouldn’t be all that complicated.

Jesus wants us to always put the other person first.

If we all did just that, conflict would evaporate.

If we all loved the other like Jesus loves us, we’d rejoice at serving the other.

We’d rejoice at allowing the other to choose.

We’d be happy to accommodate their reasonable wishes.

But when our flesh demands attention, when ourselves get in the way, conflict occurs.

And once it begins, one rarely wants to succeed ground to the other party, especially because they are always totally wrong, yes?

Since conflict will come yet again, what is your plan?

Will you deal as it comes? Take one for the team? Or be ready with the first punch?

Ask God how He would have you react. Before the next conflict.

Ask God to hold your temper. Ask Him to hold your words. Ask Him to hold your heart.

While we cannot control others, we can control ourselves. We can control ourselves as we invite God to have our whole selves.

When we submit to God, giving Him everything, it includes our tempers. Our wanting to rise up to defend ourselves no matter the cost.

Am I implying we should become doormats to ill? Heck no.

I am also not referring to abusive behavior towards you.

We’re talking normal everyday conflict. Most of it can be diffused by one, you, who is allowing Jesus full control of their heart, mind, and body.

Yet, often our responses invite the enemy to have a hay day with our relationships. Often our ill retorts throw fuel to a fire, which needs nothing to burn.

You are responsible for you. Within normal relationship conflict, will you throw fuel to the fire, or will you calmly stand as a wall the fire cannot penetrate?

Even if the other has lost all sense of reason, you can stay fastened to God. To His calm stand in the storm.

So before your next normal conflict arises, plan your response. Because when it comes, it’s terribly hard to choose the high road.

Choose it today. And tomorrow. And the next day. And the next.

Forgiveness seventy times seven seems an impossibility when wronged by a loved one. But it’s how Jesus wants us to respond.

After all, we have wronged Jesus many more times than that. Yet He still patiently waits for your precious, little heart, too.

Photos by Kelly SikkemaDirk Ribbler, & Pin Adventure Map on Unsplash

Christmas Perfection

And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. Luke 2:10-12

What do you picture Christmas to be? Specifically yours?

You know. The anticipation. What’s the picture in your head?

Children all accounted for and pleasant. Smiling, dressed in their new outfits, perfectly calm and cooperative.

Husband abiding dutifully by your every wish – after all, your ability to orchestrate the perfect Christmas cannot be doubted.

Your parents playing the proper grandparent role, doling out hugs and kisses to one and all.

The family traditional meal perfectly prepped. Your Grandmother would be proud.

Presents all wrapped, waiting for the excited hands to tear open. Everyone will love them as you spent your time thoughtfully shopping along their tastes and needs.

All family members happily sitting together at the lovely Christmas Eve service, complete with candles and carols, accompanied, of course, by the organ.

Finally, your home is clean, laundry caught up, and even the mail has been filed away.

This Christmas scenario seems like a one in a million lottery draw, creeping to align with one of God’s lesser creation miracles.

When what you picture doesn’t materialize, because it just won’t, what is your reaction?

Do you try harder the next year after your disappointment the year before?

Pout and grieve parts of the actual day away?

Or smile and stand tall anyhow?

Jesus wasn’t born among perfection.

So actually, an imperfect Christmas is holy. Right?

We try to create memories for our family. But the picture in our head is ours alone. Not theirs. Not God’s.

Prep and plan. But pause and pray more.

If your family is not all present, Jesus is still born.

If someone comes to dinner in a bad mood, Jesus is still born.

If your church forgoes real candles for fake battery imitators, Jesus is still born.

If all your presents are absolute flops, Jesus is still born.

We celebrate only because of Jesus.

We celebrate our love for others because of Jesus’ love for us.

Remain focused on Jesus, our baby in the manger.

He came to free you from sin. And from any chain that binds you up while you’re still here.

And that includes our unrealistic expectations of the day, others, and yourself.

Photos by Keith Tanner, Ksenia YakovlevaMike Cox, & Patti Black on Unsplash

Our Christmas Gift

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Isaiah 9:6

Do you find it odd our entire world celebrates Jesus’ birth?

Our secular world who seeks to elevate themselves more often than not?

Sure, you could argue Jesus’ birth has morphed into Santa, presents, and reindeer.

But even Santa is based on Nicholas of Myra, a fourth century bishop who left gifts for poor children.

Maybe the world isn’t totally lost. Yet.

How can you help your friends and family see the baby Jesus instead this Christmas?

Through you. Your witness. Your focus.

Jesus is the reason for the season. Overused phrase, yes, but it’s so true.

When you think for just a moment how deeply God loves you…..

When you ponder why God sent Jesus to earth…..

When you stop and realize how desperately you need our Savior…

You’ll discover the true meaning of Christmas.

Jesus came to earth just for you.

God missed His relationship with you that much.

He missed you and desperately wants that relationship back.

He wants you to trust Him. To love Him. To realize how much you need Him.

Because His plans for you are so good. The very best.

And to communicate that love, God set Jesus’ birth in motion.

That’s how much He loves you. All of you.

Begin to replace the commercialism of Christmas with the celebration of Jesus.

God’s peace on earth will come to your corner.

Your “why” you celebrate will alter everything. Real peace and real joy for once.

Let’s replace all the trinkets nobody needs. The gifts people return. Events we feel compelled to attend.

Replace it all with an increased devotion to Jesus, thanking Him for His gift. Himself.

Rely on Him for your peace as you dwell on the love He has just for you.

Let your celebrations stem from this and all of the gifts, events, and chaos will become worship to God.

While the world has lost the focus of Christmas, let’s keep ours, shifting back our focus to God and His precious gift of Jesus for you and for me.

Photos by Tristan ManessMax Beck, Matt Botsford, &  Alda González-Cuevas on Unsplash

Christmas Rush

Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men! Luke 2:14

Why is it this time of year seems to cause armfuls of stress?

Anyone else feel the pressure to buy everyone and their dog the perfect gift?

Anyone else feel pressured to provide all things to all people, creating perfect Christmas card memories?

And why is that?

Keeping up with the neighbors. Our friends. The entire world.

Expectations of ourselves, others, and the day.

What’s interesting is Jesus’ birth was so not complicated.

Mary and Joseph did not make the perfect reservation weeks in advance for the best room.

The angels did not record their songs, capturing the perfect moment for their social media.

The shepherds did not rehearse their reaction for perfect timing, nor did they have a Christmas outfit to celebrate the new King.

Everything just happened.

Mary and Joseph found what they could.

The angels broke out in song when they could no longer hold back.

The shepherds simply ran to the manger, wearing what they had on at the time.

And Jesus came amid it all.

Peace on earth is more than a silent night.

Peace on earth begins in your heart, surrendered to God and God alone.

When your heart is His, nothing else matters.

His peace can reign within, no matter what else churns around you.

Do the Christmas things. Have fun while you’re at it.

But keep God’s peace above all else.

Because nothing else matters, but Him.

Photos by Deep DoshiRaymond PetrikTj Holowaychuk, & Greyson Joralemon on Unsplash